I’m an empty-nester again, and I’m a little bummed about it. My 25-year-old son, who’s been living at home for the past 18 months, moved to Baltimore this week.
He’s fortunate that the company he’s worked for this past year is giving him the opportunity to advance. The bad news is that he moved 1,000 miles away from me.
Having an adult child at home doesn’t have to be a bad experience. We got along very well. I had someone to change light bulbs and kitty litter and to lift heavy things and open jars. In return, he had someone to get all up in his business and remind him of things he needed to do.
We Netflixed the “Breaking Bad” series and more recently “House of Cards.” We watched on his X-Box so he could hold the controls. If there was a hint of a sexual scene coming up, he hit the fast-forward button. No way we were going to sit in the same room and watch that.
I’ve had kids move out before. Kathy, the first, was barely 18 when I drove her to college. I cried the entire 120 miles home. In due time, Linda moved into an apartment 1/2 block away. After a year in a commuter college, Steve left in his little Subaru for Wenatchee, WA to work the apple harvest for his uncle. That summer, for the first time, I was truly an empty-nester.
Then, with life changes that came along bringing re-marriage and step-children to parent and finally Phillip’s adoption when we were in our 50’s … I haven’t had many chances to get good at this empty-nesting thing. I have found that no matter how old they were, regardless of where they were re-locating, or how crazy they were making me at the time, I always cried a little when one left.
That piece of my parenting job is over. Dear Lord, I hope I did it right.
Is someone chopping onions in here? You know you’ve done a great job as a mother and you’re the best anyone could ever ask for. Love you lots,and I just hope your other kids aren’t jealous of all the extra time we’ve got to spend together. I miss you but you know I can’t stay gone too long though! Love you so so much <3
Talya Tate Boerner says
I bet you did it right. Sweet post. Congrats to your son. Sounds like a great new adventure!
Dorothy Johnson says
I love the division of labor at your house! I know it must be hard to see him go so far away, but I think that young man had the best mothering he could have had from you. I pray favor for him in his new job and comfort for you as you rattle around the house on your own. You’re a resourceful lady. I trust you’ll be just fine, in time.
Pat Laster says
Just think of what all you can move to his room now–picture albums, Christmas/Easter/Thanksgiving/Valentine’s Day decorations. But for old times sake, leave his bottle collections in sight and all his awards and certificates. You’ll do fine. With your writing and your actress-ing, you won’t have a spare minute to miss him–much. LOL xoxo
While I don’t yet know what it feels like to be in this position, my mom does. She’s come to terms with me living here instead of at home, but if Preston and I move again, I think it’ll drive her crazy. My dad told me yesterday that I was breaking his heart. It makes me sorry to even contemplate leaving them.
So from the flip-side, it’s hard too.